So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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