i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize