i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
