my room smells like sperm. sweet.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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