i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
