My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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