This is the prime rib incident all over again
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
