...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Randomize
