she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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