maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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