i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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