I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
