I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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