She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
