maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
