Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize