Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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