Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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