We're like a lot better than the average bears
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
