I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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