Whoa Z and x make the same sound
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize