I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
