Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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