you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
