I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize