he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Randomize