I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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