Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
