I'm laying in your front yard are you home
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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