youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Dear god my vagina.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize