brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Randomize
