Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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