I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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