My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
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