Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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