giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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