I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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