8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize