Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
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i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
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I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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