awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize