Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
