Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
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