Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
