That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
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Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
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Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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