Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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