she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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