just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize