in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize