It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize