Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
